Unplanned

Some time ago, a sister came to me with a curious question. "Mal,"
she started, "I have a problem."

Now, this sister has had her share of problems. Usually ones she's
caused herself. And because of that, I waited for a hoard of angry
people to come storming in at any moment. They didn't. Instead, she
sighed and sat down next to me. I asked her what was wrong and she began
by telling me how much she loved her husband, that she just couldn't
imagine life without him.

Granted, I just kind of smirked at the time. I wasn't high priestess then,
and I had my Lace to keep me in line.

Her eyes then turned sad as they met mine, and the smirk quickly left
my face as she let out a sigh. She had met someone. This man too she
had strong feelings for. She didn't know why it happened, it just
did -- unplanned, unwanted -- but there it was.

"Why does the Goddess do this to us?" She asked. I honestly didn't
know what to say to her.

I thought for a moment as I put my arm around her and gave her a
comforting hug. "Maybe it isn't that She is doing anything to you," I
pondered, "It could be just that both of these guys sing to your soul.
And She doesn't want you miss that." I was reaching, I was sure of
it. If anything, I have a gift there.

She raised her head from my shoulder and smiled at me, content with
the answer I'd given. She soon left, and went to her husband. She told
him everything.

Now, nothing had happened between her and this second man physically.
It was a very emotional bond that they shared. But the husband didn't
want to hear it. And being the stubborn thing that he was, he left and
threw himself at a Bengal tiger. When she heard the news, she was so
upset at what she had caused.

It's been several years since I've seen that sister. Her husband lived.
She told the other man that she'd never see him again and she returned
to the husband, trying to make up for what she had caused.

The problem here is that it wasn't what she had caused, it was
what he had done to keep her to himself. She was never the same
after that. It was as though part of her self was gone.

I still think about my sister and wonder what she's doing now, if she's
still alive, and if so, if she's still with her husband.

I now believe what I told her that night. Every word.

Fire and Gems

Zillah crossed the line. I knew he would. I waited for it. Nadia told me it was fine with her should I decide to show him the bad end of my flamethrower. The other day, I did just that. I warned him I would. Repeatedly. But, Zillah being Zillah, he doesn't catch on very quickly. So I made the threat more personal. I probably shouldn't have. But I wanted him to know I was serious when I told him to stop.

I've carried out half of what I said I'd do. He felt my wrath. And he knows I full well plan to continue the rest of my promise. I have always been one to carry out a threat. Lately, I'm all the more focused. Quite possibly because of this vampire thing. I don't know. I reminded Zillah again as he lay there with his flesh steaming, that I would finish what I told him I'd do. I felt a little bad bringing Lime into it, but hey, strike where it hurts the most, right?

The following day, a bunch of us sat at the villa discussing this and that. Chara brought Poetry by. I hadn't seen Poetry in some time, really. I was a bit surprised when Chara told me about her. But, if it works for them both, so be it. Vampires have this knack for ignoring the conscious. Or simply don't have one. That's where I know I'm not quite a vampire.

Joel left for a time, only to return a bit jittery. Irritatingly so, in fact. He kept fidgeting until I practically sent daggers at him with my eyes. And so he said he wanted to talk to me privately. Into my room we went, I was almost annoyed. Happens easily these days, but still all that fidgeting...

I sat in my favorite chair as he hovered. He could see I was annoyed. He lowered his eyes to the floor. Now I was curious and annoyed. He walked over to me, dropped to a knee and told me that he loved me. In the same breath, he asked me to be his wife.

Honestly, with all that's been going on with me lately, I was feeling a little like I was neglecting Joel. And I most likely was. He kept telling me that he would stay by my side. He told me this again as he asked me to marry him. I couldn't tell him yes. I didn't tell him no. I explained that I had to think about it. With all that has happened, I needed a few days. He seemed content with the temporary answer, and we returned to the crowd.

Then I told Nadia. She stormed back into the villa, and I could hear the frustration in her voice as she screamed at him. I just shook my head and waited for her to vent and return to the atrium.

I have a lot of thinking to do in the next couple of days.

Changes

People change. It's inevitable. One day you wake, and realize you are no longer the person you were a few years ago. Every being goes through this. Life moves on.

A few days after Halloween, I found myself over-indulging in wine out in the fields of the farmhouse. I'll admit, I was pouting, but that's neither here nor there at this point. I had several bottles of wine from all over -- Salem, Italy, Spain. It was my own private party. I can't say I remember much of the night, though. I had some bad wine. I threw the bottle on the ground. Aryia was there. I felt ill. Horribly ill. Things get fuzzy after that. Though I remember yelling at Aryia to get out, not much else comes to mind.

Nadia says she was there, and I was acting strange. Other than being horribly drunk, I don't know how strange much else could have been. Apparently I had Aryia bring me food. Normally, I wouldn't think much of that. But I requested a steak. Being the vegetarian I am, I found that story hard to believe. However, each day that passes, I'm less sure of myself on that belief.

Each day, I feel....different. Joel's been hovering, waiting for whatever it is he's waiting for. I find it irritating. He said that the wine I drank was some sort of vampire thing. I laughed. I laughed a lot. But in the back of my mind, I knew something was going on that I wasn't in control of, and I had to find out what. Not being able to eat, an alertness I had never known before, I was changing. But how? I did the only thing I could think of with all of this swimming around in my head -- I went to see a vampire.

Chara was her name. And she immediately walked over to me and said that she could smell vampire blood. I felt like throwing a fireball at her for the comment, but held back. I told her what was going on, what had happened, how I felt. It was like she was the only being I could talk to about this, and she sat listening to every word. When I was done, she said I was changing. That I could die if I didn't make a choice.

The choice, however, was not one I was willing to make. She warned me that things could get bad. Really bad. And she was right. I went to the Goddess to ask for guidance. She said nothing. A warm smile was returned for my worry. And so, I don't know what to make of it all.

It's been a couple of weeks now, and I can feel myself changing. Chara said that I seem different than even a week ago, when she worried for my life. She called me a dhampir. Whatever the hell that is. Orchid says it's "dumpy", and while it's mostly because of what is happening to me, it irritates me a bit.

I don't know what's happening to me. Just that it is, and I'm not yet dead(which is a good thing to me!). But the constant nagging over me has got me annoyed and just wanting people to quit with the whispering, and the meeting behind my back, planning and plotting how to help me.

I don't need it.

The Surprise

I told him last night. I've wanted to for days. For weeks. But I kept it to myself for... you know, that whole high priestess thing.

First, I had to tell Nadia. I guess I wanted some sort of approval, or just to know that she was okay with it. Maybe I just wanted to rid myself of the guilt.

I went to Orchid earlier in the day. We asked the cards what they thought. I drew the Hanged Man. Orchid said that the cards weren't able to give an answer because they couldn't see that far into the future. I had to let go of my old fears, old beliefs, or lose the opportunity for something.

I sent him on a treasure hunt, of sorts. Clues carefully placed in some of my favorite places kept him busy while I got things ready. I had borrowed queen Dido's robes for the evening. I just love the way they look. I'll have to sneak back into her room and put them back, I suppose.

He ran into the clearing, huffing a little from all of the running around I'd made him do. I couldn't help but laugh at the look on his face when he stopped suddenly, seeing that I was there, and not another clue.

The evening turned out better than I had expected. Poor Joel was speechless half the time. Which means I must have done one or two things right, right?

I had commissioned an old jeweler friend in Egypt for an udjat. I wanted it made of solid silver, nothing else. It would be different than the others I'd seen. Unique. No other made of a single metal. I can remember, during my time in egypt when I was younger, hearing the story of the udjat. I wanted something that was out of my past, and living in Egypt is a good part of that. The last of the surprises of the evening was ready.

Joel kept this permanent, yet slightly funny, smile on his face for the entire night. I'm not sure if it was the fact that I planned the evening, or that I wore little more than those transparent robes.

Or perhaps that I was able to admit, finally, that I had fallen for him - somebody that I had bickered with, taunted, and threatened for years.

The Goddess does work in strange ways.

Though I reserve the right to bicker and taunt him still. For amusement purposes, of course.

The Price of a High Priestess

I don't really know what to think of this past week. It has all gone so quickly, and I know that the Goddess has been watching over us for it, but I can't help worrying still. I am protective of my sisters.

Ammy and Moris made a deal for Nadia's soul. Granted, Ammy did all the work -- which involved tearing apart another demon, so I know he loved it -- but, Moris' price was pretty high.

It surprised Joel that I went through Hell with Nadia to fight for her soul. It was never an option of going or staying. Even though I had forgotten my shoes. My sisters are most important to me. And I'll help them, protect them, in every way I can. That is my job as High Priestess. A job that I wouldn't change for the world.

I told Nadia not long ago that when she became herself again, I would step back and let her try to work things out with Joel. I meant this, no matter how hard it might have been to say, let alone do.

When we returned from Hell, and Ammy gave Nadia that onyx vial, I prepared myself for two things -- Being set on fire again, and being told that she wanted Joel back. I stepped back against the wall when Joel and Nadia were dealing with Maharet. I turned to leave as Rowane and Moris had done. Both of which stating it was a family matter before they stepped out. I worried for the kid. I wanted to help, but at the same time I hurt because I knew that both men were right. It was a family matter, and my sister comes first.

As I went to step into the vineyard, Nadia was rushing to Joel's side. Joel had collapsed, and as much as I wanted to run over, it didn't seem my place any longer, so I turned away. At that moment, Nadia called my name. I was going to keep moving. I felt that was best. But I didn't. I stopped and looked over my shoulder as she was standing.

I didn't expect her to tell me that I should be there, with Joel. I didn't know what to say. Sure, I wanted to be there next to him, but they were a family. She stepped back, glanced over at me, and then hung her head. I walked over to Joel and knelt down beside him, still a little confused.

As High Priestess, I have come to terms with giving up certain things for my coven. My family. My sisters. I don't complain about it. I have no need to. It's no different to than rushing to Orchid's side when Aryia and she had that little scuffle not long ago. I would jump to protect each and every one of them.

Nadia later told me that she knew Joel wouldn't go back, and that I should love him, if that was what I wanted.

I've never had anyone do that for me. I didn't know what to say. I still don't. Joel doesn't understand why I would have left him like that. I guess he never will.

He asked if I would really walk away from our relationship should Nadia ask me to. I sighed and looked in his eyes. 'Yes.'

That's the price I pay. Gladly.

Joel attempted to tell Maharet about our situation. It was quite the disaster. For some reason, she doesn't like me much. Now, I'm not good with kids. I never was, and I make no secret of that fact. But I've made my attempts at being nice to the kid, even before there was a me and Joel. She's not a bad kid, and besides, she's Nadia's too. And I like Nadia.

After much running around by her, and hiding herself from her parents, Moris was able to settle her down. I left them all to their business and sat in the villa while they were in the atrium. After some time, my curiousness got the better of me, so I walked out to see what was going on.

Maha decided that since Moris told her some secret, she wanted to tell her secret too. And what a secret it was...

She grew pale, almost grey, and her eyes turned empty. I hid behind Joel because I was expecting for flames to start coming out of nowhere again, but that didnt happen. Instead, we saw images. Strange, disturbing images.

First, we saw what happened the day that Nadia lost her soul. We saw Maharet's body, and Nadia standing next to it, crying.

Then, we saw a huge beast. He was taunting and smirking. I could make out the word 'Deal', as he reached a clawed hand right into Nadia's chest.

Lastly, Maharet stood looking up at the beast as he grinned down at her and spoke.

Maharet fell to the ground after she showed us those images and began to cry a little. I wasn't quite sure what to think, and I could tell that Moris had the same confusion as I did. Joel comforted the kid and sent her off to bed.

I'm not sure what to think about all of that. It's been on my mind constantly since that night. While the kid hates me, I am glad that I was able to see this "secret" of hers. It explained a lot.

To make things even more interesting, I saw Dashiva the following day...

With weddings normally being up there with watching the paint peel, or counting the sand kernels on my beach, I have to say that this one was a little above that.

I, of course, have to give it bonus points because I officiated. That itself does make it spiffier. But then that Orchid -- oh, how I just adore her -- went and caused some unexpected trouble. And what beautiful trouble it was!

I was a proud priestess, as I sat and watched my sister's work. Of course, the pictures have to be hidden better next time. But that all comes with practice!

I suspect that Aryia and Ranmaru will eventually forgive Orchid. Perhaps, even laugh about it all over some fruit and honey. Maybe, just maybe, there's something the Goddess can do about Ranmaru's current excessive paleness and personality disorder.

But then, all things do come at a cost....